The Girlfriend's Guide To Pee-Proof Pants
It's all about going with the flow.
Lately, whenever I leave my gym’s locker room to head towards the workout area, I find myself reciting the same question in my head that I ask our 3-year-old before we pack up for a long car ride: Do you need to use the potty?
Because when you’re staring down 42 years and have given birth twice, going potty before banging out burpees just makes sense.
My OB/GYN swears up and down that most of the women in my high-impact fitness classes are leaking, even the ones who aren’t moms. That made me feel a little better — as did my 35-year-old friend (barely geriatric by OB-GYN standards!) who told me that her Thinx “period panties” pull double duty when she’s sick with a cough. (“I call them my bronchitis undies,” she chirped.) And Ashley Wright, the dancer who went viral with this video of her pole dancing to a song from The Lion King while wearing her baby, was recently featured in a much-talked-about “Piss Off” campaign launched by Icon Undies, sister product to Thinx.
So when Icon offered to let me test drive a pair, I jumped (softly) at the chance. I was nervous they’d look like a slightly more fashion-forward Pull-Up, but as it turns out, the lacy thong version looks just as sexy as something you’d find in Victoria’s Secret … all while holding up to three teaspoons of liquid, as evidenced by their funny time-lapse video of a miniature snowman melting on the crotch of one pair. (Their hip huggers hold eight!) I now toss them into my gym bag without even thinking about my wee little problem.
And because, at age 41.75, I’m in that super-fun sweet spot where I still get my period and my bladder can use a little handholding, I’m also now apparently a period panty customer. I have an IUD, so I only need them sporadically, but Thinx fans swear they hold up to two tampons’ worth of blood. Think of them as a grown up version of those Days of the Week undies … but more like That Time of The Month undies.
And so, the evolution of my underwear has taken me from Wonder Woman Underroos … to Jockey briefs … to silky bikinis (the gateway undie to thongs, if you ask me) … to butt floss … to mesh maternity briefs … to my current combination of thongs + G-strings + pee-proof, free-bleeding panty liner replacements. No biggie; I’m fine going with the flow.